Sweet Dreams Of You

I sat at the table with my hands folded under my chin. There was family talking and moving throughout the room. I sensed his presence before I saw him. Turning in his direction I watched his form move toward me. He walked slowly, head down, staring at the plate of cupcakes he was carrying. My […]

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Time For A Change

It happened again. Another attack on innocent people. Now investigators begin searching for answers. Answers as to why a lunatic could do this is of no consequence to me. There could never be a just cause or any type of reasoning for the killing and taking of human lives in mass shootings such as these […]

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Until We Meet Again

It was at the request of Konnor’s mother (my daughter) and his father that the theme of his wake be not a goodbye but an “until we meet again.” Β The very thought of never being united, touching him or laying eyes upon him again was too much to bear. I have not applied this concept […]

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Toxic Relationships: When Do We Stop Drinking Their Poison And Get Healthy?

There is something those of us in grief become so much more conscious of, it creeps around us like a lion among sheep. We may be weakened and seemingly helpless after our tragic losses but don’t be fooled, our senses are intact and perhaps even heightened. Β We can smell the toxins. We can taste the […]

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The Monster In My Head I Call Grief

I woke up to the doorbell ringing. It was 9:45 at night, I don’t usually get visitors at all especially at this time of the night. I had not slept the night before. It was the 22nd. It was my Dad’s birthday, he had passed away in May of 2004 yet I still can hear […]

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The Dating Game: Reclaiming Love And Hope In Grief

I’m driving on my way home from a work meeting listening to my favorite music and I’m singing along. The sun is out, traffic is light, it’s been a stress free day with not much on my mind other than the current lyrics and whats for dinner. When out of nowhere…I’m singing and without warning […]

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Searching For The Light In The Darkness Of Grief

For those of you who are just beginning your grief journey, I am here to reassure you and tell you that I understand what you are going through right this moment. I have been where you are. I want you to know it will get easier. I know this sounds untrue and it feels perverse […]

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Writing A Grief Blog When Words Fail Me

I read other grief blogs from mothers who have lost their children and from spouses who have lost their husbands or wives and of course I sympathize. I ache for them as I read their words written so eloquently and poetically. They are written with purpose and emotion. They write with fluidity, their words beautiful, […]

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Is Time Running Out? How Grief Leads Us To Question Our Mortality

When Konnor died I felt as if time should have stood still. If not stopped then the earth may have shuddered, paused on it’s axis. I felt the earth shift, the very subtle stillnessΒ of it at the very moment I was told of his death. Konnor is gone, the earth stopped moving. I could swear […]

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Shattered And Broken: Grief Is Our Name and We Are Beautiful

Yes I said it. We are beautiful. Our insides have been turned inside out, we have distorted our faces with endless sobs of grief for so long it has changed our appearance. We have been shattered, yet we are beautiful in who we have become. We are strong in what we have faced in our […]

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